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thankful

Travel..Explore…

Travel. Learn. Grow. 
What you learn as you go on in life will last longer than what you own….Owning is an illusion…
The journey that is life is such like taking a very long road trip. 

  

This past weekend was adventure filled to say the least. There are so many words to describe it but all I can say is it was PERFECT! 

  

Kenya is a wonderful place to be. I love my country. 

  
Just like life, the road isn’t always smooth. We went through lots of good roads and so many breathtaking sceneries. Let’s just say we took the scenic view..☺️!
But also as there are many good roads, we also had very rough and bumpy roads. Which was welcome too as we went deep into and through the forests. And in such we got to maximize and enjoy and take in all the beauty along the trip. 

Life is like that. 
I wouldn’t personally grow if all the roads in my journey in life were smooth. The tough times I have had and all the challenges I thought I wouldn’t live through shaped me into the woman I am today. I am still growing. The roads can be tough at times and I feel like I cannot move ahead but then I’m reminded that a scenic view is waiting for me to behold and so I fluff my feathers and move along. 
Get up every morning and take a good look around in a way that takes nothing for granted. Everyday is a gift. Never treat any moment casually. 
As you travel, your eyes are open. You don’t want any moment to pass you by. You breath in clean air. You take in so much beauty. You’re sun-kissed. You enjoy the rain. You feel the warm wind on your skin. Oh my!
A mind stretched by new experiences can NEVER go back to it’s old dimensions. 
Life is full of adventure. 
Travel and be proud of the journey!!

  

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Rambling Thoughts…

  
“Thank you Lord. For today. For the Universe. For family. For food. For school. For teachers…….” A. M. E. N.  
Simple. Genuine. Precise. Leaves you Misty eyed. It’s a simple prayer of a seven-year-old boy…..Night after night mostly we sit by his bedside and pray together and I’m always wowed awed and moved. 

While my prayer is much more detailed sometimes it’s coupled with that days worries and burdens and let-downs…and it shouldn’t. But my human self let’s it!!
Sometimes you have to play the cards you’re dealt. Extraordinary Hardships….will always be there!!
Nothing can prepare us for the adversity life can throw at us. 

Day by Day…we all go through so much and we always grow through it. We all have stories that put our lives into perspective. We should not compare and compete. Instead we should learn from these experiences and get inspired. 
Being older means yes, you have learnt a lot through and through but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be open to more lessons, insights and growth. 
Not all classrooms have four walls. Lessons in life are from everywhere and everyone. All the darn time. If you’re not keen enough so many things can pass you by. 
The simple prayer from a child can change your perspective and approach to life. 
A simple idea from a 20 year old to a 60 year old can be eye opening. 
A single person can give a life-changing advice to a married person. 
Are we willing to learn and to keep an open mind?
Be resilient. 
Be uncomfortable at times ( paying attention to your emotions for emotions are meant to be felt not suppressed).
Rewrite your story. Be authentic. Share that story. You’ll realize that when you open up you’ll know people for who they are…!
See the world as it is….ha!!
Be your own superhero. 
Be creative. Improvise where you can. 
Focus on what you have. Don’t wait….
Find your purpose…based on your values. 
Have one person to cheer you on. Be with people who make you think. 
Above all leave your burdens to God. He ALWAYS ALWAYS comes through. 
Pray. 
Believe!!!

PS: (23:05:2015….it’s been three years since Papa passed away. It still feels like yesterday. We miss him dearly and we know he is always smiling down on us)

  

Time Out…

  

“You were not born to pay bills and die!”




I can’t tell you how many times this phrase gets to me. I’m sure I can’t be the only one. At times it feels like it’s like so!! 

We work! Work! Work! Work!
A good friend of mine once asked me along time ago how I fit anything social into my life! It was a true genuine concern which actually saddened that moment…. I actually do…otherwise I would go mad…I said😂😂

Everyone needs time out.

 To re-focus. 

To breathe.

 To be centered. 
I work very hard. That’s a fact. Two jobs. There’s a job after my regular job. But I don’t mind. There are people with no jobs!!

 And there are many people who do the same. Work! Work! Work! I love my job. Helping people who are in pain get better is fulfilling to say the least. I am thankful. Being thankful goes a long way. At least I know it works for me. It’s important that people be thanked for what they do. It really is. Otherwise they might never know how much they’re appreciated. 

The world is ever changing. People have to make ends meet. But also finding a correct balance at times becomes a challenge. Times moves so fast!!
Then you have to have a circle that makes sure you’re grounded. That you don’t have to break when you do these things. When you adult. People who are willing to remind you that it’s okay to take time out and regroup. People who are willing to listen to your troubles and actually understand why you work so hard. People who remind you that asking for help is not being weak. People who don’t judge you in whatever way. 
It’s 9:12am on a somewhat cold-ish Friday. It’s been a tough week of fighting a throat infection and crazy traffic jam. But I’m feeling super energetic and light. 

Life is tough. 

Life is beautiful. 

It’s even better when we take time out every so often. 
Work hard. But live life!!
Life is for living.

 Not for enduring!

  

Another Added Year…

   
 
21:27pm
3rd May 2018. 
It’s my birthday. Yaptidooooo☕️😊
This month I’ll plan to celebrate it everyday as we should. And so I’ve planted a seed of hope and faith in my head and I’ll see to it that it takes root daily. I will water this garden with daily inspiration and positive vibes. 
I spent most of the day replaying the story that is my life and that has been….
There have been huddles and obstacles and I’ve always pulled through somehow. 

 So I’m feeling like I’m Watching it all again and it’s slow motion in some areas and fast in others. And I’m getting that tickling feeling in my chest and thinking to myself: this is what happiness feels like. Being able to accept your journey irregardless of however it has been and picking yourself up when you fall. 
So begins another added year full of explorations and untapped potential.

 Full of cheer and love. 

Full of life and laughter. 

Full of wealth of health. 

Full of God and His guidance. 
The garden looks green so far. I can’t wait for the colors that it’ll provide in the flowering period. 

  

Bright and Beautiful is my belief. 

I can feel it!!

  

Being Hands on…

16:12 pm

The 4th day of April 2018. 

Having been in the office the whole day, where it’s been chilly, I’m welcoming the warmth of the sun on my face….and Oh it feels heavenly. 

It’s been a mildly busy day. And my mind has been racing today. Too many things to think about. 

But I can’t complain really. I’m alive. I’m Here….. Now…in this moment😊!

And with my grateful heart, and my rambling thoughts I managed to enjoy a pen down. 

As you grow older, you realize why and how words are only words unless you back them up with some action. 

It’s just a question of training yourself and also the very many experiences you encounter as you scurry through life. 

Life is hands on. 

You have to put actions into the thoughts that fill your mind. Be it affirmations. Dreams. Goals….you have to get into it!

While at it, avoid getting distracted by things that have nothing to do with your goals. 

There are many things that we just think about but we don’t put them into action. Today morning is a good example…I snoozed my phone while I should’ve got out and did my workout. The result was me feeling even more tired. 

Clearly….when you snooze you loose. 

So aim at doing the hard thing. Challenge yourself to do better every moment. Kick out that duvet and face the day. 

I teach my son that you have to be practical in life. Read. Play. Help out…..

This life is not for being spoon fed. It’s tough…it’s beautiful. It’s a one shot chance to be the best we can be. You can’t get through life always thinking you’re right. Make mistakes but give life a chance. Live. 

“A certain type of perfection can only be realized through a limitless accumulation of imperfect!”
Do your art. Dance. Sing. Create. Workout. Read. Hug. Cook. Don’t just talk and talk. 

Try to be hands on. It’s fun. 

  

You Matter…

“Treat people like mirrors & watch how you reflect in their eyes…!”
A sweet lady I know just sent me this text as I was getting myself ready to scratch this writing itch that has persisted. I journal everyday alright, but that’s different…
This is to tell you that God is Timely, Never doubt that people! I needed that text today…
Monday was a drag! To say the least. But I survived it. That’s why I wanted this therapy. Writing is my Escape. 
Today holds a better promise plus I’m feeling amazing. I am oozing positivity. So let’s indulge in it!
Instead of focusing on making ends meet, which is okay. Let’s live. Now! 
Here is how I am doing it: 
1: Pauline Don’t rush

I am focused on not trying to tackle everything at once. One thing at a time. One emotion at a time. One moment at a time. One day at a time. To Breathe!
2: Put off/ brush off Negativity 

I am an ambassador of this one. Ha! ha! Someone made me so mad the other day, I was shaking with fury. Literally shaking…Lord have Mercy! I decided consciously to move away from that moment, from that environment and literally sort some air, to breathe…this helped a lot. And while I’m yet to attend to that party..one that I have to sort…I choose to not dwell on it. Quiet time is mandatory to sort through your emotions. Whether they’re raging or not. 
3: Get emotions out

At times life takes you to breaking points. You wanna scream, cry, beat your chest, call out profanities.. It helps. 

Sort through the emotions I say. Handle the emotions nonetheless. Don’t shy away. 

Get in lots of positive vibes. The negative won’t have room. 
4: My Value… My Worth

How much are you worth? Ha! Ha!

Rate yourself as high as you can. I am and I try to be authentic( it’s a lifelong journey), nourish yourself, feed your soul with all the good stuff, trust your journey, be fab. You matter.
5: Just one Me: 

I am becoming the best version of who I am meant to be. Mentally. Emotionally. Physically. But I want more money( 💯✔️😹😹). I am more wholistic in my approach to life. I cherish what I have in the present moment. I am lucky. I realized that my enjoyment of something doubles if I realize just how lucky I am to have it. So cheers to Life. Cheers Pauline. 
6: The Good

Ha!

When you get somethings right, you enjoy so many aspects of life….God. Love. Motherhood. Family. Work. The positive power of Friendships. Food. Etc
I still need more of Sand in my feet and wine in my hands. Vacation. Vacation. 
7: Goals

My goal today is to take yesterday to another level and tomorrow to soar high. But to ultimately sparkle today….go Higher, be better, be more positive, have lots of fun!
8: Quality/ Quantity

The Quality of moments lived is awesome when you maximize on them. No matter how much time you’ve got. Be meaningful. Connect with your moment. 
And so I am smiling because I am feeling good. My itch is scratched. My coffee needs a refill, but I am content. My heart is feeling settled. It’s beating for it’s purpose. I am alive in this moment. I am thankful. 
Ps: You are powerful, prove it to yourself. 😊

  

Future Self…

Dear future Pauline,
It’s 19:55pm on the tenth day of 2017, October. You’re heading home after a rather hot day. Work was good. You’re listening to Goo Goo Dolls and loving it. 
You’re in your early thirties and you’re going to ask yourself questions more often than not. Questions like, if I made different choices in life will I be here in this moment? 

And if I chose different, would it be a better moment or good or best? 

Would I be a better parent? 

A better friend? 

Or daughter? 

You’re going to wonder why people never follow script 😂😂💦. 
But one thing that will quiet your busy mind is the fact that you’ll be grateful for what you have:

Life. 

Health. 

Motherhood. 

Friendships. 

A job. 

Shelter. 

Food. 

And you’ll find that that list of gratitude will always grow.

You will work hard to keep healthy habits.

You’ll cherish the people who matter to you and you will take care of them wholeheartedly. 

Many things will break your heart but you will rise above because of your ability to take the lessons and learn from them. 

You will try and find positivity wherever it exists. 

You will be guarded but open to those people who show you that they’re worthy. You will break. 

You will be broken. 

You will laugh. 

You will love. 

You will sing. 

You will dance. 

You will embrace the days as they come. Because mastering the art of loving yourself wasn’t an easy path. 

And with each new chapter that life will present to you, you will know that you’re the author. You hold the pen.  

You will aim to write a story that will be engraved in many hearts. 

The bad news is that time flies. The good news is, I’m the pilot!!
It’s 20:10pm and I feel good having written. I’m almost reaching home. The commute wasn’t that bad. It’s a good evening. 
Let’s see what the next moment brings. 
  

Remembering Papa..

  
Minutes turned into hours, hours into days, days into months, months into years….two to be exact since wings were officially fixed on you and you found your way to heaven and now dancing with the other angels. It’s never easy at all, it never has been and it never will. I wish we are prepped long before when someone leaves just how to live without them. Maybe it will make it easy. 

As we go on day after day, we cherish the memories and enjoy the time God gave us with you. I keep thinking about you even if it pains…..

There are so many things that we need you to see. Words are inadequate…..

Dad….How ironic is it that people waste moments not listening to or paying much attention to people when they are alive?… But when they are not there, We live yearning for those moments? Life is Tricky at times. 

Hard lessons are instilled into us..that you should cherish people who matter in your life. To Find time….Not excuses!!

I want to assure you that in as much as life has it’s twists and turns, we are trying our level best in our èndevours. 

In The curve balls that life throws at us, we put our trust in God and somehow we pull through. 

My consolation is that I always know that you are smiling down on us. 

And as we continue to celebrate your life, we Thank God that He made you for us. 


Dance Papa. Dance. 

  

The Here and Now….

Days fly by so fast. So so so fast. At times you can’t catch up. Other times you are at per…..In the moment….
You go through life expecting things to happen for you. Doing what everyone expect of you, tucking your happiness under your pillow when you make your bed in the morning on some days and on other days letting things go and focusing on the now. At times you don’t take charge of your life…You at times decide to just be…
I am 💯% responsible for my life. I am my choices. I am in charge. I just need to remember that. Always.
I could give me more credit for my talents and abilities. I could do with more belief in self and confidence. This is always a work in progress in all of us….
The weekend felt awesome and it proceeded to make Monday feel like an additional day in the weekend. You laugh so hard you wanna cry or you actually do. These moments don’t happen everyday but they happen. Special moments. Bonding with family and friends….
I only got one shot in life. This is it. It’s a great gift. I mean why should I not enjoy everything that it has to offer? We can’t turn back the hands of time and do things over again. Nope. You just can’t!!
You have to venture out. Into the unknown. With faith. Belief in self. Smiles. Laughter. Tears. Heartbreak. Highs. Lows. All of it. 
Just know how to react to the situations. 
Remember: God opens millions of flowers without forcing the buds. Reminding us not to force anything…for things happen perfectly in time…
Stay Zen!!
  
 

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